Martellus Bennett celebrates a TD

Bears tight end Martellus Bennett celebrates the first of his two touchdown catches in Sunday's win over Minnesota. He also hauled in the game-winner from Jay Cutler with 16 seconds left. (Anthony Souffle / Chicago Tribune / September 15, 2013)

Brian Urlacher’s playing career is over, but he’s still dishing out hits.

Since becoming an analyst for Fox Sports 1, the legendary Bears linebacker has stirred the pot on faking injuries, why he hates some of the NFL rules changes and how Jay Cutler gave him the brush-off.

He should have had interesting things to say after the Bears rallied to top Minnesota 31-30 on Sunday in a wild shootout at Soldier Field.

Jay Cutler threw two interceptions and fumbled once. But he also fired three touchdown passes, including a 16-yarder to Martellus Bennett--aka the "Black Unicorn"--with 16 seconds left to seal the comeback win.

“That’s two weeks in a row where communication between me and Cutty showed up in the red zone,” Bennett said. “That’s what we’ve been working on.

"You ever try to catch a butterfly with your hands? You can't do it. You need a net. They've got butterfly nets. And hopefully they don't make a unicorn net just for catching unicorns, especially black ones.”

The Bears as a whole were just elusive enough, and they begin the season 2-0.

Certainly the Bears were not focused at all on Urlacher on Sunday afternoon, and rightfully so. All the more reason to let us zoom in on “What Would Brian Say?”

 

Devin Hester

He exploded for 249 kickoff return yards, a Bears record.

WWBS: Let’s see a cheetah do that! Even a cheetah with a jet pack on roller skates.

What Jay Cutler actually said: “[Hester] was averaging 50 yards a kickoff return. … It’s hard to win a game with four turnovers. You can’t do it without great special teams play and a good defense.”

 

Cordarrelle Patterson

The Vikings receiver returned the opening kickoff 105 yards for a score, a Soldier Field record.

WWBS: I totally would have caught that guy if it weren’t for my bad knee. A few more rounds of Regenokine therapy, some shark DNA and a bratwurst and I’m good to go, Coach Trestman!

 

Martellus Bennett

The “Black Unicorn” hauled in seven catches for 76 yards and two TDs, including the game-winning score.