1. Clint Dempsey's goal against Ghana was so fast ...
Tracy Swartz: ... it was Ghana in 60 seconds.
Julie DiCaro: ... it made "Blended's" run in theaters look long.
Soxman: ... Sox Girl said it made me look like a marathon man.
Brad Zibung: ... I totally missed it, along with the rest of the game.
Ernest Wilkins: ... I hadn't even finished the words to "America, [bleep] yeah" yet.
2. What should U.S. soccer hero John Brooks get for his next tattoo?
Tracy Swartz: "Go subs go."
Julie DiCaro: Cristiano Ronaldo's "sad face."
Soxman: Simply "The Man." I feel a Beats headphone commercial in his future.
Brad Zibung: Something "tribal" like all the other cool kids.
Ernest Wilkins: In the words of Kevin Hart, "YOU GHANA LEARN TODAY!"
3. Whom would you rather have on the Bulls: Carmelo Anthony or Kevin Love?
Tracy Swartz: Kevin Love because I Love a name that can be punned easily.
Julie DiCaro: Kevin Love -- it's the beard.
Soxman: A Rose is a sign of Love.
Brad Zibung: Jimmy Butler and Taj Gibson.
Ernest Wilkins: Melo, only because we don't have to give up half the team and a gyro burger to get him.
4. What should the White Sox take with them on their 11-game road trip?
Tracy Swartz: The Cubs.
Julie DiCaro: ... he *might* be ready to take on Marvin the Martian. Maybe.
Soxman: "Game of Thrones" Season 4. I still can't get over that finale!
Brad Zibung: Probably their bats and gloves and stuff. That's the sort of thing I'd tend to forget, which is why I'm not an equipment manager.
Ernest Wilkins: Same thing my mom used to pack in my bag: a note that says, "Win or don't come home."
5. Aaron Rodgers is to Johnny Manziel as ...
Tracy Swartz: ... cheesy is to American cheesy.
Julie DiCaro: ... Johnny Manziel is to, uh, no one, I guess.
Soxman: ... Darth Vader is to Luke Skywalker. The force is strong with him; but he's not a Jedi yet.
Brad Zibung: ... Aaron Rodgers is to Jason Campbell, Brandon Weeden, Brian Hoyer, etc. Manziel's just a Browns QB until he actually does something.
Ernest Wilkins: Well, can I just say I never want to live in either city they play in? No? Why not?