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Get Pau Gasol a Netflix subscription, stat!

By Jake Bressler

For RedEye

2:21 PM CDT, July 14, 2014

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This might be the last Chicago Sports Twitterverse in months not dominated by the Bears, so let's waste little time in getting to the major story: An all-star 7-foot Spaniard is coming from L.A. to help the Bulls win a championship. We know a lot about Pau Gasol's game. He's an elite post scorer, double-double machine and won two titles with the Lakers as Kobe Bryant's second option. And off the court? Well, he has terrible taste in late-night TV.

I wish you the best in your future projects @JayLeno !!

— Pau Gasol (@paugasol) February 7, 2014
Gasol might have been the last person in America younger than 60 watching the old "Tonight Show." This is an embarrassing tweet, but if he can stay healthy next year, all will be forgiven. The Bulls will also add forward Nikola Mirotic, a 2011 draft pick who has played at a high level in Spain's professional league. Some really qualified overseas basketball scouts are already predicting future stardom for Mirotic.

David Nurse says Nikola Mirotic will probably become the next European NBA star. http://t.co/rGojkpCYLT

— HoopsHype (@hoopshype) July 14, 2014
I don't know about Europe, but in America, we don't really trust anyone in the medical field to judge hoops talent. Getting back to the serious issue here, Mirotic has long been a somewhat mysterious character in the Bulls' long-term plans.

'International Man of Mystery' Nikola Mirotic is headed to the #Bulls, via @KCJHoop. http://t.co/do05JqC0SH pic.twitter.com/aEhDeEyRoJ

— ChicagoSports (@ChicagoSports) July 13, 2014
It would be great if he showed up in Chicago with bad teeth and a British flag car. #austinpowers. Let's be honest, though, a 15-foot jumper will do just fine. In other news this week, White Sox pitcher Chris Sale and Cubs first baseman Anthony Rizzo grabbed last-minute MLB all-star nods when they were both voted in by fans. The #voterizzo hashtag was promoted so heavily by the Cubs that people started to pick up on the ridiculousness. Some hilarity ensued.

Not everyone will want you to #VoteRizzo, but, you know what? pic.twitter.com/9Bpv6lfQhj

— Brett Taylor (@BleacherNation) July 10, 2014
See, if only the city's Divvy bikes were pink unicorns. One lucky fan even got out of doing regular household chores to #voterizzo.

Told Travis I couldn't clean until after 3 when voting ends, he told me not to clean at all #besthusband #VoteRizzo

— Brittany Wood (@bwz428) July 10, 2014
And many Chicagoans started to attach #voterizzo to every tweet, including completely asinine observations or life goals.

Wish I was drunk all the time. #k #VoteRizzo

— Drewbabyyy (@Drewbabee) July 11, 2014
Dear Drewbabyyy, I think that's achievable if you just put your mind to it. #voterizzo. Finally, like I so often conclude this column, I present a quick take on the Bears, who start training camp soon. Cornerback Tim Jennings is a favorite of the Twitterverse, and he spent the 4th of July on a creepy mission to find the best side dishes.

Me today!!! I'm crashing everybody BBQ looking for the best potato salad!!!! #creeplife #happy4thhttp://t.co/riQS1rFwm2

— Tim Jennings (@HennOrJenn26) July 4, 2014
The thing I can't figure out here is if you are going to crash other peoples' barbecues, don't you want to try the hamburgers, hot dogs and chicken breasts? Potato salad is the last food I'm grabbing while I quickly avoid strange family and friends. Here's hoping we get more answers soon. Jake Bressler is a RedEye special contributor.

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