1. What does "lat tightness" mean?
Georgia Garvey: It's an illness exacerbated by acute about-to-get-traded-itis.
Julie DiCaro: I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you.
Soxman: For Ryan Dempster: trade anxiety. For Jake Peavy: business as usual.
Ernest Wilkins: I don't know, but it sounds hot.
Brad Zibung: It means you're out of commission one day or six weeks. One or the other.
2. Now that the Hawks have re-signed Brandon Bollig, what should they do next?
Georgia Garvey: It's the perfect time to help Kaner finally get that obedience school diploma.
Julie DiCaro: Sign someone to be Kaner's permanent chaperone/sponsor.
Soxman: Find a way to reacquire the Stanley Cup. When they had that, it was pretty awesome.
Ernest Wilkins: Go 'head and Bollig out of control, man! God, that's a terrible one.
Brad Zibung: I heard the bathroom mats in the Cubs' spiffy new offices really don't match the rest of the decor. Hint hint, Theo!
3. What should the penalty be for flopping in the NBA?
Georgia Garvey: Two postgames spent holding LeBron as he sobs in the locker room after a big loss.
Julie DiCaro: Two games wearing one of LeBron’s giant headbands.
Soxman: Banishment from ever contending for a championship or a lifetime contract with the Chicago Cubs.
Ernest Wilkins: Ten minutes in a closet with Charles Oakley. Whoo! Just got chills.
Brad Zibung: You have to lose another Finals to a team the rest of the world is cheering for because of how much they hate you.
4. Kicking a tennis line judge is like ...
Georgia Garvey: ... Roger Clemens doing steroids: It's only a bad idea if you get caught.
Julie DiCaro: How should I know? What are you implying?
Soxman: ... an instant qualifier for the John McEnroe Sportsman of the Year Award.
Ernest Wilkins: ... kicking a pigeon. Both visuals make me chuckle.
Brad Zibung: ... pretty much just that. Kicking a tennis line judge.
5. What do you expect from Mike Tyson's show on Broadway?
Georgia Garvey: One misdemeanor arrest per night, minimum.
Julie DiCaro: Blood and jazz hands.
Soxman: Wicked ear-biting ditties like the Jersey Boys.
Ernest Wilkins: Style that is impetuous, defense that is impregnable, and not a lot of kids in the audience.
Brad Zibung: Wait. What? That's not an actual thing, is it?