1. How did you celebrate Ron Santo's Hall of Fame induction?
|Frank Holland: With a cheer for it finally happening and a groan for it taking so long. Ronnie deserved it.|
|Scott Bolohan: The same way Ron Santo did.|
|Clark Jones: Paid bills, ate vegetables, bought underwear and did a bunch of other things that were long overdue.|
|John Dooley: I clicked the heels of my remote control away from all Cubs baseball.|
|Angi Taylor: I jumped and clicked my heels after I got word ... then had a nasty Old Style.|
2. What did the Bulls learn from their Las Vegas Summer League stretch?
|Frank Holland: Don't split anything less than two 10s in blackjack, and this season likely will be rough without D-Rose.|
|Scott Bolohan: No matter what MJ says, never hit on an 18.|
|Clark Jones: At the end, Derrick Rose was on the roof the whole time.|
|John Dooley: Vegas? I guess Jesse Jackson Jr. isn't the only person to leave Chicago being barely noticed.|
|Angi Taylor: That all those "European style" topless pools aren't as sexy as you'd think they'd be.|
3. How can the White Sox get back into first place?
|Frank Holland: Tell the pitchers to breathe out their eyelids, maybe call Susan Sarandon.|
|Scott Bolohan: Convince Justin Verlander it's always the All-Star Game.|
|Clark Jones: Remind the Tigers they play in Detroit, then let depression just do its thing.|
|John Dooley: Secede from the Central Division.|
|Angi Taylor: Remind the Tigers they live in Detroit, pray they fall into a deep depression.|
4. Losing a golf tournament on the final putt is like ...
|Frank Holland: ... coming up short at the last minute in an actual sport. Sorta. Golf is an activity. Fun one though.|
|Scott Bolohan: ... my love life circa 2007-present.|
|Clark Jones: ... finally winning an argument with your wife ... then a condom falls out of your pocket. #soclose|
|John Dooley: ... a huge heartbreaker. Like a fiancee cheating days before your wedding. I'm looking at you, Mario Lopez.|
|Angi Taylor: ... having a geek in glasses and a turtleneck ruin your postseason. (Bartman references never get old.)|
5. What must the NHL do to avoid a work stoppage?
|Frank Holland: Get the union and the league to "negotiate" at center ice: no gloves, no masks, no mercy.|
|Scott Bolohan: Front-load the CBA and make it for way too many years.|
|Clark Jones: Relax some of their immigration laws.|
|John Dooley: Hold Alan Thicke hostage at Molson Brewery. Thicke walks and beer is released only after agreement!|
|Angi Taylor: Change their name to the NFL and hope people show up to games.|