1. How did Tom Thibodeau celebrate his contract extension with the Bulls?
Ernest Wilkins: By smiling? Nah, actually stay ice-cold, Thib-a-docious!
Julie DiCaro: By not singing the seventh-inning stretch at Wrigley.
Soxman: To quote Seal's Batman ditty: He got a "Kiss from a Rose."
Brad Zibung: Studied only 18 hours of game Monday film instead of his normal 20 that day.
Stick Figure: Not by riding a real bull, I hope. That looks like it hurts!
2. What's the first thing the Cubs/White Sox will do when the season ends?Ernest Wilkins: Julie DiCaro: Soxman: Brad Zibung: Stick Figure:
Ernest Wilkins: Cubs: Sell tickets based on hope. Sox: Get some damn bullpen help.
Julie DiCaro: Dodge rotten tomatoes on their way out of the players' parking lots.
Soxman: The White Sox will drive each other home, something they didn't do in September.
Brad Zibung: They're still playing?
Stick Figure: Grab something to eat. I know I get really hungry after all that exercise.
3. What should be the Cubs' punishment for reaching 100 losses?
Ernest Wilkins: They should have to watch themselves play.
Julie DiCaro: The fans should have the option of swapping them for the Astros.
Soxman: "Soriano" have it in me to goat on the Cubs after the White Sox swoon.
Brad Zibung: Isn't losing 100 games enough punishment?
Stick Figure: Apologizing to all the goats they've ever offended.
4. Why have Jay Cutler's jersey sales taken a hit?
Ernest Wilkins: Because he isn't "friendly." Dude, I don't care anymore. Win a Super Bowl. We good.
Julie DiCaro: Because they hold on to the ball too long. (Get it? GET IT?)
Soxman: As he had a great game Monday, I WON'T say baby size jersey sales are actually exploding.
Brad Zibung: Because people don't want to wear his jersey because they think he's a jerk. However could they get idea?
Stick Figure: Well, if people take care of the ones they have, they don't need to buy new ones.
5. When Wayne Gretzky says the NHL could be back by Jan. 1, you say ...
Ernest Wilkins: ... wanna bet on it? (See what I did there?)
Julie DiCaro: ... if by "NHL" you mean the "AHL," then yes, I agree.
Soxman: ... quit icing my hopes with your empty net promises.
Brad Zibung: ... fingers crossed that he's not still loopy from that head injury he got in Swingers.
Stick Figure: ... why didn't the NHL take us on vacation, too?