www.redeyechicago.com/sports/redeye-achy-20140430,0,5700213.htmlstory

redeyechicago.com

Achy

May is here, though you wouldn't know it, seeing as its weather is disguised as April's. And someone get Joakim Noah some aspirin.

6:50 PM CDT, July 19, 2012

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1. Make a sports prediction for May.
Matt Pais: The United Center's delicious buffalo chicken tenders get the credit they deserve.
Jay St. Pierre: There ... Will ... Be ... Blood!
Jane Monzures: Playoff beards will grow very, very long.
Kat Velez: The Cubs will be mathematically eliminated from playoff contention.
Michael Walton II: Cubs will lose at least two games.
2. Jonathan Toews is in the running for so many awards ...
Matt Pais: ... I fear he never learned about sharing. Or he's just a great player.
Jay St. Pierre: ... shouldn't it be "in the SKATING for so many awards"? Wow, I need to work on my hockey jokes.
Jane Monzures: ... he gets the award for getting so many awards!
Kat Velez: ... it's a shame that he'll probably lose all of them.
Michael Walton II: ... he might as well give one to Taj Gibson for getting robbed of the sixth man of the year award.
3. What will be your lasting memory of this Bulls season?
Matt Pais: Some combination of a dunk, a scream, a brick and disappointment.
Jay St. Pierre: No memories. That was a season to forget.
Jane Monzures: The time Benny the Bull spilled popcorn on everyone. Oh wait, he does that every game. OK, just Benny the Bull.
Kat Velez: Those few fleeting days before the playoffs when we thought they had a chance to go far.
Michael Walton II: Joakim Noah finally showcasing his full potential and becoming Chicago's second DPOY.
4. Give us one word for how Joakim Noah's body feels right now.
Matt Pais: Yeah, like you'd print that.
Jay St. Pierre: Educated. `Cause let's face it, Nene schooled him during the series.
Jane Monzures: Used.
Kat Velez: His back must be sore from carrying this team most of the year.
Michael Walton II: Nene (too soon?).
5. Convince the Bears to put their team on HBO's "Hard Knocks."
Matt Pais: Come on, guys. Come on! Seriously, come on.
Jay St. Pierre: I don't care who's on it as long as Cutler and Marshall make an appearance and sing "It's the Hard Knock Life."
Jane Monzures: With faces like Lance, Jay, Kyle, Brandon and Izzy, how could we not put them on TV?
Kat Velez: It's not like you can embarrass yourselves any more than you did last year.
Michael Walton II: No better way to build diversity than putting your team on HBO.