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Five on Five: Nervous yet?

These five seem to have their Bears fever under control. Probably because they┐ve given up.

By Chris Sosa, @redeyesportschi

6:50 PM CDT, July 19, 2012

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1. How nervous are you for the Bears heading into this weekend?
Phil Thompson: If we have to be nervous about the Arizona Cardinals, why even go to the playoffs?
Tracy Swartz: Reading the Cards, outlook not good.
Alex Quigley: Not. If we win, postseason is in play. Lose, and Lovie is gone.
Jimmy Greenfield: Extremely nervous; it's causing a flare up with my Irritable Growl Syndrome.
Bag Boy: I'm nervous. I'll be more nervous that they'll win the next two and changes won't be made.
2. Why is Carlos Boozer playing better than last year?
Phil Thompson: When you finally ditch the Captain Weird Beard look, you play better with your team-mateys.
Tracy Swartz: He's taken fewer trips ... over gym bags.
Alex Quigley: That Rose guy isn't weighing him down anymore.
Jimmy Greenfield: He stopped taking his name literally.
Bag Boy: It's easy to excel in the preseason. No, wait, the regular season started?
3. Which Chicago athlete will be next to complain about fans who boo?
Phil Thompson: Alfonso Soriano? But what do I know, I had doubled down on Jay Cutler being first.
Tracy Swartz: The Cubs. I think of them as "one" instead of "won."
Alex Quigley: Hopefully, a Chicago Blackhawk.
Jimmy Greenfield: Carlos Boozer, of course.
Bag Boy: I'm going to say ... someone irrelevant. Any member of the Bears offense.
4. Finish this sentence: When I think Bulls-Knicks, I think ____.
Phil Thompson: John Starks: in-your-face nemesis, bag boy extraordinaire and forefather of the punchable face.
Tracy Swartz: Everyone needs to chill, er, Melo out.
Alex Quigley: Hue Hollins is dirty. That call was crap.
Jimmy Greenfield: Could the NHL please stop ruining my winter?
Bag Boy: Derek Harper, Jo-Jo English, fighting at the commissioner's feet, 1994.
5. What present would you by for a Chicago sports figure this year?
Phil Thompson: I'd give Brian Urlacher a can of Raid to get rid up that bug up his ... oh, look, fruitcake.
Tracy Swartz: I hope the Bears got my holiday letter this year. The letter "W."
Alex Quigley: "Madden 13" for Mike Tice.
Jimmy Greenfield: I'd buy ever member of the Bears' offensive line some big boy pants.
Bag Boy: Blood transfusion for Lovie Smith. That corpse could use something in those veins.