1. Who will be the next Bear to get demoted?
Marc Silverman: The schedule maker. Can the Bears play against Christian Ponder every week?
Pete McMurray: If I'm J'Marcus Webb, I'm loading up on butt warmers for the next game
Ernest Wilkins: Smokey. All that fire prevention awareness, no shirt. Just lazy.
Elliott Serrano: Mike Tice will be going from offensive coordinator to just plain offensive.
Sarah Spain: Fozzie. His schtick has gotten really tired. I mean, "Wocka Wocka Wocka"?
2. How would you punish Ndamukong Suh?
Marc Silverman: Implement soccer rules. Free kick at ball for Matt Schaub.
Pete McMurray: He lives in Detroit. Can one be punished any more?
Ernest Wilkins: Make him watch the Florida State-Florida game. It hurts, you guys. It hurts.
Elliott Serrano: He should spend an evening getting kicked in the groin at one of those self-defense classes for women.
Sarah Spain: I've always believed in "an eye for an eye" -- or in this case, a groin for a groin.
3. What's your impression of the college basketball season so far?
Marc Silverman: Illini's basketball Groce is way better than Illini's football gross.
Pete McMurray: Love it! It's like pizza -- even when it's bad, it's good!
Ernest Wilkins: No clue, been watching "Trapped In The Closet" the whole time.
Elliott Serrano: I've paid as much attention to college basketball as I have the NHL.
Sarah Spain: I thought that started in March ...
4. Printing 6,300 shirts to entice a college hoops recruit is like ...
Marc Silverman: ... the Bears printing up 6,300 "help wanted -- offensive linemen" ads. It can't hurt.
Pete McMurray: ... that girl in college you sent the two dozen roses to -- it just looks desperate.
Ernest Wilkins: ... proposing to someone at the bar you think is hot -- kinda thirsty.
Elliott Serrano: ... sitting in front of a girl's house with a boombox over your head playing "In Your Eyes." Creepy.
Sarah Spain: ... bringing three dozen roses to a first date. Looks a little desperate.
5. The NHL canceled the 2013 All-Star Game. How are you feeling?
Marc Silverman: Who? Canceled what? When? Never heard of them.
Pete McMurray: Terribly depressed. I watched Game 5 of the Stanley Cup finals Tuesday. We won AGAIN, btw!
Ernest Wilkins: We ain't having hockey, folks. May I recommend a little show called "Trapped in the Closet"?
Elliott Serrano: I feel as much for the NHL as I do for college basketball. It's like a moebius strip!
Sarah Spain: Like Jerry Maguire without Dorothy Boyd -- incomplete.