Holy crap, it's hockey time already

Well, that was quick.

I'm not sure I'm done savoring the Blackhawks offseason, but it's back to the ice already. They beat Detroit the other night in an exhibition. I have no comments, no insight, no snarky remarks, no anything to report other than, "Hey, I'm still exhausted from last season. I'm not ready yet!"

And yet, here we go. Yours truly also hasn't had any quality alone time with the Cup. Everyone else I know in Chicago has seen it! Relatives keep sending me pictures. "Oh, Rocky was speaking here. He brought the Cup." "Oh yeah, we were out late one night and ran into so and so, he had the Cup with him!"

Hey! Enough! As a member of the media (that's debatable), I demand quality time with the Cup! And a picture! Blackhawks, make this happen.

OK, back to business. Thanks Blackhawks, for returning. That's yet another thing to help us forget the sorry state of baseball in 2013. Here's the first of many obits to come. Both teams will lose more than 90 games. The worst season since the middle of last century. The big-time stars are too old, their replacements are too young. I find myself looking up the websites of "Birmingham Barons" and "Kane County Cougars" and other outposts to see how the future is looking.

As noted, can't wait until this all plays out. In 2015 or so.

Yeah, you can hit the snooze button for next year, too. Consider yourselves warned.

To the good stuff. The Bears could be 3-0 after visiting the shoddy Pittsburgh Steelers.

Marc Trestman: He gives intelligent, thoughtful answers to questions. He's just like Dick Jauron, if Dick Jauron were interesting and articulate.

Wow, just a terrible comparison there.

I'll just say, Devin Hester: The less we give you to do, the better you are. Less is more!

Please tell the pass rushers the season has started.

Could we please please please have a peek or two at Jonathan Bostic again? Not one snap! I feel cheated.

More undefeated news: Northwestern plays Maine this weekend. They could go 4-0! One of their secrets, according to a New York Times piece? Good sleeping/napping habits.

Well, I could have told you that!

Bag Boy is a RedEye special contributor.

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