By Jack M Silverstein
12:48 PM CDT, September 16, 2013
A quick list of all the wacky crap that transpired in the Bears' 31-30 win over Minnesota:
1. Minnesota's Cordarrelle Patterson returned the game's opening kickoff 105 yards for a touchdown.
2. Devin Hester returned the ensuing kickoff 76 yards, en route to a Bears franchise record 249 kick return yards.
3. Martellus Bennett scored two touchdowns, giving him as many for the season (three) as all Bears tight ends had all last year.
4. Jay Cutler was sacked only once, the first time as a Bear he's been sacked fewer than four times in a season's first two games. On the other hand, the lone sack also was a fumble returned 61 yards for a Vikings touchdown. So there's that.
5. Hester returned the next kickoff 80 yards … the Bears ran four straight plays to set up first-and-goal from the 1 … then Cutler threw a pass that was tipped, batted and intercepted in the end zone.
6. Four plays later, Tim Jennings picked off Christian Ponder and dashed 44 yards for a Bears score, the team's 16th defensive touchdown since the start of 2011.
7. One player on each team forced a fumble by literally taking the ball from the ball carrier.
8. The Bears went scoreless in the second half until the game's final 16 seconds, when Cutler and the "Black Unicorn" hooked up for their second touchdown of the game.
So yes, it was a surprising win in many respects. But what didn't surprise me, and shouldn't surprise any Bears fans, was how it ended.
With Brandon Marshall (6-foot-4, 37-inch vertical), Alshon Jeffery (6-3, 36.5-inch vertical) and Bennett (6-7, 34-inch vertical), the Bears have three targets able to win nearly any jump ball. The three teamed up for 72 yards and a touchdown in the game's final drive, and Bennett's game-winner was a testament to his size and talent, as he outleaped a defender, made a marvelous catch, turned and fell into the end zone.
Bears 31, Vikings 30. Ain't nothing surprising about that.
Jack M Silverstein is a RedEye special contributor. @ReadJackWant more? Discuss this article and others on RedEye Sports' Facebook page.
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