By Bag Boy
2:41 PM CDT, August 22, 2013
We've come across a little used option this past week. We need to use it more.
J'Marcus Webb, having lost his starting right tackle job, has agreed to take a cut in pay.
Wow. I mean … wow. I didn't think that was possible in 2013. You know, holding athletes accountable for performance. I'm stunned.
It also got me thinking, though, that there are a few others here in town that could stand a cut in pay. Here's a short list.
>> Adam Dunn (big surprise). $15 million for strikeouts. I keep thinking I'll see this line. Dunn: 0-for-4, five strikeouts. Only he could do it.
>> Starlin Castro. First he spaces out (not the first time) and now can't get it right at the plate. He actually batted eighth this week! They're paying him to be a star, not a No. 8 hitter.
>> Anthony Rizzo. He's young, he's learning, but hey, cut his pay so he knows what it feels like.
Back to the Bears. If Jay Cutler doesn't start moving the ball around and looking off Brandon Marshall, get him a pay cut.
Or try this: Since he's not throwing to anyone else, sign a bunch of offensive linemen. Give them receivers' numbers. Run a pass play, but only Brandon Marshall runs a route. The rest just block!
That kind of solves our offensive line problems too! More help for the kids, Kyle Long and Jordan Mills.
I can't believe I came up with that. Genius.
Another piece of genius may have been inviting Mike Ditka to Halas Hall. A simple act, it seems, yet it's taken some new faces at Halas Hall to pull it off.
Nice move, Marc Trestman. I love how he said, "He's always welcome back whenever he wants to return."
Um, careful coach. This is Chicago. He's still Ditka. If you don't watch it, in a week he'll be coaching special teams.
In a month, he'll have your job!
I'm just kidding, maybe. Though Ditka would probably look at the QB situation and mumble, "Sheesh, hasn't anything changed around here?"
Still Chicago, coach.
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