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Sports

Bulls have options. Lots of options

I'm trying to read the tea leaves about the Bulls, and it's not easy.

Our dear Bullies took small forward Tony Snell out of New Mexico and power forward Erik Murphy out of Florida in the NBA draft, which tells me nothing. Snell is a tall, athletic wing who can play big at guard or quick at forward. Murphy is 6-foot-9 and can shoot. But what does this mean?

When asked about the new players, Bulls coach Tom Thibodeau talked about shooting.

"You can never have enough shooting," he told ESPN on Thursday. This is Thibodeau who said that, which is crazy. Everything my eyeballs have seen so far tells me this is a man who can never have enough defense. All he does all day long is scream about defense. He seems genuinely upset anytime an opposing team scores its first two points. "That wasn't supposed to happen," is what I imagine he's screaming at his players, "you bums need to try harder."

Analysts are talking about the Bulls using these picks to "space the floor" with "length" on "catch-and-shoots" with "wingspan." I think these are all fancy codes for "We plan to just stand around and get out of Derrick Rose's way, jack shots from the perimeter and let Joakim Noah get the rebound if we miss, then turn around and mush the opposition into our armpits on defense."

With possible sidebars of Luol Deng being up for grabs and the possible amnesty-clause release of Carlos Boozer if either of the new players offers some positional redundancy. But I don't know what next year's team will look like or what general manager Gar Forman will do in free agency. Nobody does. Probably not even Gar Forman.

The Bulls have options. They are nothing but options right now. After going deeper in the playoffs than seemed possible with a banged-up crew of replacement warriors, they now have the benefit of a deep bench of fungible players with the highest possible trade value. It seems like an opportune time to make waves.

Or stand pat because these guys did so well without Rose or Deng or Kirk Hinrich. Or maybe add some shooting because apparently you can never have enough. I don't know. My head hurts.

RedEye special contributor Ben Johnson is a comedian at iO Theater in Chicago.

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