Sports
Sports

What would Kobe tweet? Bulls-Nets edition

Thanks to an injury, Kobe Bryant (@kobebryant) is watching the NBA playoffs from well off the sidelines. So he did what any athlete with a smartphone would do: He angrily live-tweeted the L.A. Lakers' loss to San Antonio in Game 1 on Sunday.

Among his gems: "What I would say if I was there right now? 'Pau get ur ass on the block and don't move till u get it' #realtalk"

On Monday, Bryant tweeted he'd cease that practice from here on out. But RedEye gladly picks up where the Black Mamba left off. Presenting: What would Kobe Bryant tweet, Bulls-Nets edition.

 

FIRST QUARTER

12:00: Got my Joakim Noah jersey on. starting even tho he's hurt. watch and learn, pau gasol!

11:03: Hold up, fans actually show up ON TIME in Brooklyn? Must be crappy weather in NY. That's why I luv LA.

9:03: Wooh! Noah's jumper is just as smooth as mine. #notreally

8:58: Booooooriiiiiing. Come on refs it cant be that complicated a foul call.

8:34: Two points for Brook Lopez … on that takedown. He's moppin the flo w/ Kirk Hinrich. #earthweek

7:00: Damn Boozer's jumper goes higher than fans at a Snoop Dogg concert lol. Fadeaway's not half bad tho. Mine's still better.

2:00: BOOMSHAKALAKA. b11 making the bulls PAY with that dunk.

0:00: 37 combined points in the first quarter? That's barely a quarter for me. #notkidding #alsonothumble

Score: Bulls 20, Nets 17

 

SECOND QUARTER

10:32: Mr. Ex Kardashian is in the game! Congrats on the settlement. #goodriddance

9:56: Luol Deng's wrist is hurt but he still finishes strong on the break like my boy steve nash. Man I wish I were playing.

8:51: That old guy heckling the Bulls' free throws actually works! Too bad Boozer tipped in the second miss.

5:14: Bulls need a TO. Buncha guys in foul trouble but they still lead. Go figure.

4:13: Post. Post. Post. The Bulls need a bucket but won't listen to me, while b11 eats them alive inside.

2:48: That's my boy @nate_robinson. Shoot first, apologize later. Nah, j/k. No apologies.

1:22: Y'all see that dunk by deng? Even better pass from @joakimnoah. #yourmovedwighthoward

0:00: STONE COLD 3 by C.J. Watson! Reminds me of me.

0:00: Halftime! plz tell me beyonce's doin the show. Hell I'll take blue ivy. When the sexy nurse coming to wash my ass?

Score: Bulls 47, Nets 46

 

THIRD QUARTER

10:10: Sweet 3 by hinrich. just a slap in the face to the d.

9:55: Noah just busted up b11 goin to the lane… hey where did @drose get that powder blue suit? Is that a real gold tie? ha!

8:00: Foul fest foul fest foul fest.

7:02: Hey hinrich you are a GUARD. You cant be shooting 0 for 3 from the ft line. Bench em Thibs.

6:15: Nazy Mohammed sighting. That dude is almost as old as I am. #aginggracefully

5:13: Luv @stacey21king calling these gms. I'm on the Booze Cruise! Though I prefer the Bryant Bus.

2:45: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!! That's my Jimmy Butler impression after that strong flush. Waddya think?

Score: Bulls 69, Nets 57

 

FOURTH QUARTER

11:34: I told y'all matador d doesn't work. Belinelli looked like the Flash on that drive.

9:38: Nate Robinson vs. hardwood. Hardwood wins every time. #thatsgonnahurttomorrow

7:32: Damn Robinson almost took that coach's head off with that pass. Borrow hinrich's goggles next time.

6:16: Boom! Noah slams it. This game has a "steal one" written all over it for us. I mean, for the bulls. Must be the painkillers tweeting.

4:11: Joe Johnson is the new frontrunner for the kobe award. #makinitrain

2:48: So THAT'S why the Bulls wouldn't trade Deng for me. Clutch. Oh so clutch.

0:00: Post. Post. Post. Noah. Boozer Deng. Can't. Be. Stopped. Why. Am I tweeting. In threes?

0:00: To tweet or not to tweet.. I CHOOSE not 2. Series tied going back to Chicago. My work is done here, Bulls fans. #dropsmic

Final score: Bulls 90, Nets 82

Want more? Discuss this article and others on RedEye Sports' Facebook page

Copyright © 2015, RedEye
Related Content
  • D-Rose's Summer Vacation

    D-Rose's Summer Vacation

    It's just a matter of weeks before Derrick Rose, who's feeling 100 percent, is playing for the Bulls again. In the meantime, he's chillin' in Asia and Europe, putting on clinics, laughin' it up and saying hi to kids. Want more? Discuss this article and others on RedEye Sports' Facebook page. 

  • Autoplaying videos: A pitiful and pathetic idea from the beginning

    Autoplaying videos: A pitiful and pathetic idea from the beginning

    I hate having the thought in my head that it took something as upsetting as Alison Parker and Adam Ward’s horrendous killings to finally showcase how pathetic the autoplay feature is on various media and social websites.

  • Group to Park District: Build DuSable Park

    Group to Park District: Build DuSable Park

    Where Lake Michigan meets the Chicago River is three acres of overgrown weeds and shrubs. It is referred to by some as a "ghost park" because it is hidden in plain sight.

  • Rejoice! Adele's new album is rumored to arrive this fall

    Rejoice! Adele's new album is rumored to arrive this fall

    There's a fire starting in my heart and it's making me realize it's been kind of a while since Adele released an album. Her last full-length "21" dropped in 2011 and I barely remember that year it feels so long ago. But now, there's some good news to fill our recently Adele-less lives and it's...

  • Chicago rappers Probcause and Saba team up on 'M.I.A.'

    Chicago rappers Probcause and Saba team up on 'M.I.A.'

    Welcome to RedEye's "Song of the Day," an ongoing feature where music reporter Josh Terry or another RedEye staff member highlights something they're listening to. Some days the track will be new, and some days it will be old. No matter what, each offering is something you should check out. Check...

  • Trump vows never to eat Oreos again, citing move from Chicago to Mexico

    Trump vows never to eat Oreos again, citing move from Chicago to Mexico

    Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump repeated his claim Tuesday evening that he would stop eating Oreos, citing the cookie maker's decision to close a plant in Chicago and move it to Mexico.

  • Let's talk about this new Justin Bieber song 'What Do You Mean?'

    Let's talk about this new Justin Bieber song 'What Do You Mean?'

    Don't get me wrong, Justin Bieber is still really embarrassing. He's the young pop star who recently said something only a 21-year-old would say, "Now being 21, and going through some hardships, I think you can hear that in my vocals." This is a guy who, last year at a charity gala benefiting AIDS...

  • Illinois lottery winners have to wait for payout due to budget impasse

    Illinois lottery winners have to wait for payout due to budget impasse

    After years of struggling financially, Susan Rick thought things were looking up when her boyfriend won $250,000 from the Illinois Lottery last month. She could stop working seven days a week, maybe fix up the house and take a trip to Minnesota to visit her daughter.

Comments
Loading
70°