Whether you are going to the fest or at home with FOMO, we got you covered.


1. The Bulls have one game left in the regular season. How are you feeling?
Clark Jones: Like D-Rose's ACL, we're ready, but God knows if we can handle the playoffs.
Pat Tomasulo: Woke up with a little sniffle but OK now. Thanks for asking.
Scott Bolohan: I've had some pain in my heel lately, probably unrelated to the Bulls.
John Dooley: I feel 100 percent. But not 100 percent. Good enough to play ... but not.
Stick Figure: Really hungry, as usual. I wonder why that is ...
2. How will the Cubs greet A.J. Pierzynski when they play Texas on Tuesday?
Clark Jones: Remember how Nolan Ryan greeted Robin Ventura? That'll work.
Pat Tomasulo: Michael Barrett bobblehead night.
Scott Bolohan: With one of those buzzer handshake things. Cubs got jokes.
John Dooley: With a Michael Barrett memorial photo montage and hug fest.
Stick Figure: Using hand signals. You're No. 1 too, A.J.!
3. With Kyuji Fujikawa on the DL, how should the Cubs handle the closer's spot?
Clark Jones: Extend the beer serving hours until the 9th inning ASAP.
Pat Tomasulo: Sign Kyra Sedgwick.
Scott Bolohan: Lose earlier.
John Dooley: By putting the entire closer's role on the DL, too.
Stick Figure: With oven mitts.
4. What should Loyola know about joining the Missouri Valley Conference?
Clark Jones: The Misery Valley Conference was the original name.
Pat Tomasulo: The conference tourney was in St. Louis. Still want to go?
Scott Bolohan: First, Missouri has a valley, which was previously unknown to me.
John Dooley: We do this crazy thing in the MVC ... it's called "attending sporting events."
Stick Figure: Bring a notebook. It's tough to remember all the important details at a conference.
5. When Kobe Bryant returns from his knee injury ...
Clark Jones: ... the Miami Heat will be wrapping up another championship. David Stern already told me.
Pat Tomasulo: ... I'm guessing he'll have to recover from his Achilles injury?
Scott Bolohan: ... Dwight Howard will have gotten three coaches fired.
John Dooley: ... we can expect a limp in his travel.
Stick Figure: ... he should return the crutches to the hospital. It's not nice to steal.
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