1. The Bulls have one game left in the regular season. How are you feeling?
|Clark Jones: Like D-Rose's ACL, we're ready, but God knows if we can handle the playoffs.|
|Pat Tomasulo: Woke up with a little sniffle but OK now. Thanks for asking.|
|Scott Bolohan: I've had some pain in my heel lately, probably unrelated to the Bulls.|
|John Dooley: I feel 100 percent. But not 100 percent. Good enough to play ... but not.|
|Stick Figure: Really hungry, as usual. I wonder why that is ...|
2. How will the Cubs greet A.J. Pierzynski when they play Texas on Tuesday?
|Clark Jones: Remember how Nolan Ryan greeted Robin Ventura? That'll work.|
|Pat Tomasulo: Michael Barrett bobblehead night.|
|Scott Bolohan: With one of those buzzer handshake things. Cubs got jokes.|
|John Dooley: With a Michael Barrett memorial photo montage and hug fest.|
|Stick Figure: Using hand signals. You're No. 1 too, A.J.!|
3. With Kyuji Fujikawa on the DL, how should the Cubs handle the closer's spot?
|Clark Jones: Extend the beer serving hours until the 9th inning ASAP.|
|Pat Tomasulo: Sign Kyra Sedgwick.|
|Scott Bolohan: Lose earlier.|
|John Dooley: By putting the entire closer's role on the DL, too.|
|Stick Figure: With oven mitts.|
4. What should Loyola know about joining the Missouri Valley Conference?
|Clark Jones: The Misery Valley Conference was the original name.|
|Pat Tomasulo: The conference tourney was in St. Louis. Still want to go?|
|Scott Bolohan: First, Missouri has a valley, which was previously unknown to me.|
|John Dooley: We do this crazy thing in the MVC ... it's called "attending sporting events."|
|Stick Figure: Bring a notebook. It's tough to remember all the important details at a conference.|
5. When Kobe Bryant returns from his knee injury ...
|Clark Jones: ... the Miami Heat will be wrapping up another championship. David Stern already told me.|
|Pat Tomasulo: ... I'm guessing he'll have to recover from his Achilles injury?|
|Scott Bolohan: ... Dwight Howard will have gotten three coaches fired.|
|John Dooley: ... we can expect a limp in his travel.|
|Stick Figure: ... he should return the crutches to the hospital. It's not nice to steal.|
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