Dear Stupid (and you know who you are, Bears fans):
Love, Jay Cutler and Lovie Smith.
OK, so maybe the Bears quarterback and head coach didn’t say it that way at the podium, but they probably wanted to.
Cutler, in fact, actually did blister the idiot fans, getting caught on camera mouthing “shut up’’ and maybe some pottymouth stuff after Soldier Field fans cheered their way into embarrassment Sunday. Some fans didn’t know it at the time, and believe me, some fans still don’t get it, as you’ll read later.
Whichever way Cutler and Smith said it, whatever words they used, the point is the same: Shut up.
Read my lips: Shut. Up.
Act like you know football. When the Bears are about to go in for a score at home the way they were early in the 41-21 vivisection of the Colts on Sunday, shut up. You’re embarrassing yourself and hurting the Bears.
I posted a video on the Tribune website Monday that said something similar, which prompted a response from a fan claiming to be a season-ticket holder in the north end zone. The fan emailed that Cutler “waved to the crowd to make noise.’’ No lie. This cheering nimrod saw Cutler make the universal sign for quiet -- arms waving, hands palms-down -- and still believes the Bears quarterback was asking for noise because it might have something to do with disrupting the Colts’ defensive communication. Seriously. That’s what this emailer wrote Monday.
Cutler angrily burned a timeout when it happened. After the game, Cutler pleaded with fans to “tone it down a little bit’’ until after the Bears score. But this emailer believes Cutler wanted fans to drown out his calls.
This brain-addled emailer isn’t alone, but in the land of the stupid, I have found the king.
Or maybe everyone in the north end zone can move to Jacksonville. The Jaguars will take any fans they can get, even idiots. Maybe especially idiots because who else would attend their games?
Look, people, you’re fans of a heritage NFL franchise. No, wait, THE heritage NFL franchise. But as soon as the Bears get to the 1-yard line, you start acting like you’re at Oprah’s “Favorite Things’’ show.
What’s worse, Cutler can audible this season. Unless idiot fans neuter that important option.
This doesn’t go for everybody in the end zones, but this also isn’t a new problem. That’s why the Bears often practice for home games with piped-in crowd noise.
On Sunday, Cutler pleaded with fans to pipe down. On Monday, Lovie Smith asked for quiet when the Bears are about to go in. Later Monday, Cutler reiterated his stance during his radio show.
What part of “shut up’’ don’t some fans understand?