Firing on Bears who need to be fired

The part of the Bears’ season with any meaning is over.

Which means the Bears’ firing season can begin.

Can we start with Caleb Hanie and Jerry Angelo? Pretty please?

In a game where the Bears’ starting quarterback threw three interceptions for the third time in four games since replacing injured Jay Cutler, then I think we can start with that quarterback.

Hanie can go. Check that, Hanie has to go. Right now. Today, if not as soon as he threw another pick-6 to the fattest guy on the field. Hanie threw another pick-6 near the end of the game, the season, all hope, whatever you got.

I’m thinking Hanie can hitch a ride with Angelo, the general manager who brought in Hanie, stuck with him as a backup for several years, and saw the guy kill the Bears’ playoff hopes.

A quarterback in charge of four straight losses -- that’s the best that Angelo could do?

A guy who had a quarterback rating of 33.3 Sunday -- that’s all you got?

Here’s how inept Hanie’s offense has been the last month: When Julius Peppers knocked the ball out of Tarvaris Jackson’s hand and Israel Idonije recovered it in the end zone, the defense had scored as many touchdowns as the offense in three weeks.

Hanie is good for maybe one drive a game. The rest of the time, you have to game-plan to prevent him from killing his own team.

Oops, too late to save Sunday.

Oops, too late to save the season.

Oops, too late to save the kid’s career.

Hanie said his confidence “will be there.’’ I don’t know where “there’’ is, but it cannot be here. Let him play his bad football somewhere else. He hasn’t learned how to learn, so, let’s see if the Bears have learned anything.

Hanie and Angelo couldn’t do their jobs, so they cannot be allowed to keep them if the Bears plan to get the Hope Train rolling.

Stop the Bears before Angelo tries to draft offense or tries to fix the side of the ball that had been deodorized by Cutler more than we knew. Angelo’s drafting disasters and personnel mistakes at wide receiver and along the offensive line have made a mess of this season and who knows how many more.

The Bears went into Sunday’s game with all three quarterbacks active. They did not go in with a quarterback who was any good. So, remember, kids, don’t confuse activity with ability.

Also, kids, don’t confuse accomplishment with Angelo.

And I’m not even talking about the Sam Hurd cartel.

Hanie might not have been a total disaster if Matt Forte had stayed healthy. Angelo can wear that, too, especially after his backup running back mentally and physically choked the week before. Is it just me, or is there a pattern here with Angelo’s personnel decisions?

Tell you what, if Cutler or Forte tries to play Christmas night against the Packers in a game that doesn’t matter, then a lot more people need to be fired.

Actually, a lot more people need to be fired anyway. Mike Martz, for instance, I’m done with him, and I don’t think I’m alone. He has yet to do anything good with a quarterback behind Cutler.

The Bears have to realize how stupid they look with an offensive coordinator whose playbook is so dense and complicated that a veteran can’t pick it up in five days the way it works around the rest of the league.

Roy Williams can go, too. Big mouth, little production. Eliminate any vestige of what Martz wanted.

I would love to ditch the entire offensive line because everybody’s playing out of position. At least, that’s the way it looks and feels. A guard is playing center, a center is playing guard, a guard is playing right tackle, a right tackle is playing left tackle, I have no idea what the other guy is good at, but he’s a backup for a left guard who was drafted and paid like a left tackle. Connect the dots, people. I dare you.

The next coach who puts Devin Hester at receiver gets fired, but only because they won’t let me hook the sucker up to electrified razor wire.

You know who else I want to fire? Fans and so-called experts who shovel the insulting garbage that Lovie Smith’s teams come up big when things seem to be at their worst. Wise up, people. Smith’s team made this mess with an embarrassing loss to Tyler Palko and a choke in Denver.

Smith’s team didn’t rally Sunday. Smith’s team choked in the second half of the most important game of the season.


Smith’s team came up lame when excellence was demanded.


Smith’s coaching staff got pantsed when brilliance was necessary.


Sunday’s mess was fitting for this season’s ugly turn. So much was exposed -- no, confirmed. That might make all of this feel worse.

You know what would take the edge off this Bears’ death spiral? About 1,000 pounds of pot, that’s what.

Copyright © 2015, RedEye
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