My girlfriend really wants a motorcycle, but I don’t know [bleep] about motorcycles. I know about how much it will cost, but she’s still unsure about which one she wants. Even when she sees one that she likes, she doesn’t try it out because she can’t afford it. Is it cool to just give her cash so she can really start looking for one? I would present it in a way that isn’t just handing her cash.
—Question via Reddit
THREE ANSWERS
Shelbie Bostedt
Single | 23 | RedEye online content coordinator | @shelbielbostedt
With the holidays right around the corner, your best bet would be to present it as her present this year. Let her know that you know how badly she wants a motorcycle and that you want her to be able to get the exact one that she wants (within a price range). That way you kill two birds with one stone: Knock the present out and help her get her motorcycle without giving a handout.
Jake Newton
In a relationship | 24 | RedEye designer | @jnewt
So your question is, “Should i give my girlfriend some money to buy something she wants?” Setting aside what she’s spending the money on, I would say that it’s completely acceptable to give cash as a gift. To the people who say cash is a thoughtless present, I can only ask if they’ve ever received a [bleep]y gift (I know I have). Why waste your time searching for something she might not like (I get it, “it’s the thought that counts”) when she’s made it clear what she wants? So, yes, it’s totally “cool” if you throw her some coins for something she really wants. If you feel like you’re lacking sentiment in your gift (or feel as if she’ll miss it), you could always throw one of your favorite photographs of each other in a frame or maybe a keychain for her new “hog” (did I use that correctly?). Both can be done on the cheap so it’s not like you’re going over budget. Happy bike shopping!
Michelle Lopez
Married | 32 | RedEye digital editor | @michelleglopez
I, too, don’t know [bleep] about motorcycles, but I do know that this is one hefty gift you’re talking about. In order to avoid any potential awkwardness, take a look at where you two are in the relationship. Would she even be cool receiving a gift of that magnitude? With big-ticket items like this, you have to be careful you aren’t going to end up making her feel weird in accepting it or feel added pressure that she has to up the ante with your future presents. If all signs point to yes, then it’s time to get creative. Maybe buy her a helmet (safety first, folks) and with it include a handmade certificate that indicates you’ll cover a part or all of the cost of a new bike. The stereotype about cash gifts is that they aren’t thoughtful, but in this instance I think you are on the right track, especially since you know how badly she wants this.
Thanks for reading “Threesome.” Each week, we take a look at a relationship question from the public and have three panelists give their insights. Have a question to ask? Shoot it over to us on Twitter at @redeyechicago or on our Facebook page. If it’s a little more private, feel free to email it to redeye@redeyechicago.com with the word “Threesome” in the subject line.
