To what extent should a person’s profession affect your decision to date or commit to him or her?
THREE ANSWERS
Shelbie Bostedt
Single | 22 | Digital Content Coordinator for RedEye | @shelbielbostedt
In the same way that other lifestyle choices would influence your decision to date someone, their profession can as well. While it’s slightly different from other lifestyle choices, like drinker or non-drinker, a person’s job can affect the way they live their life, from spending long hours at work, to being on call, to maybe not having a work ethic in line with yours. If you thrive in relationships based on stability, maybe don’t date a musician who’ll be traveling a lot. If you crave spontaneity in your relationship, maybe don’t date a banker who works 60 hours a week and most weekends. These lifestyle choices will likely manifest in ways outside of just their job description, so you likely won’t need to make that decision based solely on their resume.
Michelle Lopez
Married | 32 | RedEye Digital Editor | @michelleglopez
Someone’s profession can definitely be a deal breaker, and that’s OK. Most likely this is something that would come up on or before your first date, so it puts you in a place to think it all through. Expectations are key here. For some people, their career is something they’ve worked hard at and won’t be willing to walk away from, so you kind of sign up for what you get. Certain professions are going to come with some perks and some will possibly have disadvantages for you as their partner. This all can vary, whether you’re dating anyone from a professional athlete to a police officer to a journalist. The better question is, to what extent are you flexible and comfortable enough with your lifestyle possibly changing with this relationship? If you think this person could still be worth it despite that, then you have your answer.
Morgan Olsen
In a relationship | 28 | RedEye Eat & Drink, Lifestyles editor | @morgancolsen
My automatic response is zero. But this question is much more personal than that. I know a lot of folks—both men and women—who care deeply about what their significant other does for a living. Ultimately, you have to decide how heavily this weighs into your opinion of that person. But here’s what I’d advise: Jobs, salary and success will change over the years. You and your partner will undoubtedly go through ebbs and flows in your careers. That’s life. Oftentimes, the more telling signs of a successful match can be found in personality traits and long-term wants, needs and goals. Look there first and factor in profession later.
