This is not how White Sox fans envisioned this season playing out. Not after acquiring bullpen help and shedding Adam LaRoche’s unhelpful bat in the offseason. Not after that torrid start. Not even after the James Shields hail mary.
Yet here they are, stumbling out of the All-Star break and into what usually is the most tense part of the season: the Crosstown Classic.
Although the Cubs clearly are capitalizing on their talent more than the Sox and appear destined for glory, none of that matters the next four days. What does matter, even beyond the next two series at U.S. Cellular and Wrigley, is how fans represent themselves. My advice for Sox fans is as follows.
Do: Maintain a sensible dislike for the Cubs, if you must. Emphasis on sensible.
I never used to understand why some Chicagoans profess love for both the Cubs and the Sox. Then it occurred to me that it’s simple math. There are two teams in our city and they play in different leagues, so why not double your chances to celebrate a World Series winner? Then again, one could argue that having two favorite teams means you’re only half as excited should one win the title. Math is hard. At any rate, that’s not how it works in real life. So if as a Sox fan you prefer to embrace disdain for a team that hasn’t won a World Series in more than a century, have at it. Just try not to lose sleep or throw a fit whenever the North Siders win. All you’re doing is causing your blood pressure to skyrocket, and that’s no fun.
Don’t: Assume all Cubs fans are tourists and bandwagon jumpers.
It’s easy to disparage casual Cubs “fans” who care only about seeing and being seen at Wrigley Field. “Fans” who couldn’t tell you the name of one player on the team, much less what position he plays or what the standings are. Those fans are out there, no doubt. But to argue that all fans are of this ilk is just silly. You’re also depriving yourself of some damn fine baseball conversations by carrying this attitude around the city.
Do: Tailgate.
Baseball tailgating is even better than the football version because, unlike during gridiron season, you’re not freezing your you-know-what off the closer it gets to playoff time. Pro tip: Make sure you have a bottle opener. Maybe keep one in your trunk. Inevitably, some of your fellow revelers will forget theirs, and coming to their rescue is a great way to make friends. (Or pretend you forgot yours and bring extra beer to the potential friends in a neighboring car. That works, too.)
Don’t: Hoard ballpark giveaways and try to make a profit.
I once arrived at a Sox game too late to receive a free bobblehead doll. I wasn’t exactly crestfallen, but another fan nearby caught wind of this and offered to sell me one for $20. Don’t be that fan. Take one and move on. Other fans deserve cubicle trophies, too.
Do: Bring your own food, but not too much.
Although the Sox have gone further than most teams to entice cost-conscious fans into visiting the stadium ($5 tickets? How can you go wrong?!), food and beverages can break the bank if you’re not careful. What you can do to mitigate that is bring your own. Yes, you can bring your own food into the ballpark in a sealed plastic bag. That said, the food at The Cell is outstanding, so you also would be wise to save room for dessert/bacon on a stick/a Cuban sandwich—the list goes on. At the very least, bring bottled water. Just because the beer is pricey doesn’t mean you should shirk hydration.
Do: Give a ball away once you’ve caught it.
Throwing home run balls back on the field might be acceptable at the Friendly Confines (at least until someone’s errant toss conks someone on the head), but it has no place on the South Side. Better option: Give it to a kid. Besides the glowing personal satisfaction you’ll get from making a youngster’s day, you might get a free beer out of the deal if the child’s parents are feeling generous. Same goes if you give away a foul ball you snag.
Don’t: Run onto the field.
You’d think this would be common sense by now. Unfortunately, beyond those two infamous morons who attacked the Kansas City first-base coach, some fans sprint onto the playing surface only to be pummeled by security. What do you think you’re accomplishing? You’re not even being shown on TV. All you’ve done is force your friends to bail you out of jail, though if they were smart, they’d let you stew in there as long as possible.
Do: Appreciate what the team has going for it, even when the franchise looks lost.
The Sox’s moves on paper in recent offseasons have looked like enough to transform them into a title contender. Sadly, they have been little more than mediocre since 2008, and they’re not looking any better in 2016. So until management either chooses to rebuild completely or hits the jackpot like in 2005, have patience. Pick your spots and try to see Chris Sale or Jose Quintana pitch. Admire Adam Eaton’s hustle, especially when teams foolishly try and run on his throwing arm. While there is always room to express your displeasure about the overall product, there are bright spots if you know where to look.
@redeyesportschi | chsosa@redeyechicago.com
