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Cubs center fielder Dexter Fowler  in the dugout after he scored  against the St. Louis Cardinals at Busch Stadium in St, Louis  on  May 24, 2016.
Nuccio DiNuzzo / Chicago Tribune
Cubs center fielder Dexter Fowler  in the dugout after he scored  against the St. Louis Cardinals at Busch Stadium in St, Louis  on  May 24, 2016.
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If the Cubs finally end their World Series title drought, the amount of excitement that will wash over the city will be staggering.

And that will be slightly more overwhelming than how fans are projected to celebrate.

Home Run Inn Pizza and marketing company Digital Third Coast ran the numbers on just how big the party would be.

As soon as the Cubs clinch that last win, 5 million people will immediately descend upon Wrigleyville, they project. Based on data from the Red Sox’s 86-year-drought-breaking World Series win in 2004, that figure comes from the Red Sox victory parade crowd of 3.2 million, multiplied by how much longer the Cubs’ drought has been than Boston’s was at the time of their win (126 percent longer, or a 26 percent increase, to be exact). Adjust for population, as Chicago’s is about four times larger than Boston’s, and you end up at a whopping 5 million people and change.

On a normal day at Wrigley, beer flows freely, but on a day that would see the end of a 108-year World Series drought? Let’s just say it’s going to get rowdy. Famous Cubs broadcaster Harry Caray used to put away 12.6 drinks per day, according to a “drinking diary” he kept. If 80 percent of the 5-million-person crowd is throwin’ them down at that rate—sorry, kids and DDs—we’re looking at 100.8 million beers over a two-day period. As if we’ll stop drinking at any point between the win and the inevitable city-sanctioned parade.

If there’s any room left in our stomachs with all that beer floating around in there, the city will pound a whopping 280,800 hot dogs. Where will it all go? Probably all over the pavement down Clark Street. Sorry, city sanitation.

Once you’re full of beer and hot dogs, you might want to start thinking about ways to commemorate the win. According to the Home Run Inn data, the winning game ball could be yours for around $3.3 million, based on data from the purchase of Mark McGwire’s 70th home run ball in 1998. Chump change to put away a piece of history, right? If you’re not able to throw away a few million, some used infield dirt from the game will run you only about $124,500.

Trying to get home safely after all that commotion will also cost you a pretty penny, with Uber surge prices skyrocketing as high as 25 times the normal fare, based on the 50-times surge rate once seen in Stockholm, Sweden, and New Year’s Eve 8- or 9-times surges. Better to Uber than to try to drive after those upward of 100 million beers, right?

@shelbielbostedt | sbostedt@redeyechicago.com