Ah, the Super Bowl. Time to eat snacks until you’re more full than a Wrigleyville bar on a Saturday night and actually enjoy having your mind poisoned by advertisers.
If you’re still figuring out whom to root for because the Bears are out of the picture, I offer an opinion: NOT the Broncos. Full disclosure: I am a Steelers fan. Not that I’m biased. Except that I totally am.
1. Peyton Manning is annoying.
His head is too big for his helmet, and he screams “OMAHA!” too much. And I’m over his comeback story. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but he’s old, and this season’s stats are a reflection of that. According to numbers compiled by FiveThirtyEight.com, he’s one of the worst passers to make it to the big game. Does that sound like someone who deserves a Super Bowl ring?
2. The Panthers feature former Bears
If the Bears aren’t going to get to make it to the big game, you might as well root for former Bears. Coach Ron Rivera played for the beloved 1985 team, and don’t forget that Charles Tillman, Jared Allen and Greg Olsen once proudly wore the orange and blue.
3. Cam Newton’s dab is awesome
More losing-related things that happen for the Broncos mean more winning-related things that happen for the Panthers, and the more chances we will get to see Newton celebrate. It’s a win for everyone watching.
Bonus: Denver has already won two Super Bowls
Why not spread the wealth? Carolina went to one Super Bowl, in 2004, but lost to everyone’s favorite villains, the Patriots. Give the boys their rings! (I know what you’re thinking: The Steelers have won six Super Bowls, and if they were in it, I’d still root for them. You’re correct. Rules and logic do not apply to my love for Pittsburgh.)
Bonus, Part II:
Currently it’s colder in Denver than it is in Chicago, but it’s much warmer in the Carolinas. Where would you rather go to escape the (not-so-bad) winter?
@ace_cercone | acercone@redeyechicago.com
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