Remember when Harrison Ford was young and irritable, instead of old and curmudgeonly? Yeah, neither do we. What do you think this is, the Wall Street Journal?

Anyway, with the angel of death eventually rapping at his door, the 71-year-old may soon retire from the Indiana Jones franchise, which was bought by Disney in December. According to the Latino Review, the moue house is looking at a list of potential actors to replace Ford, including Bradley Cooper.

Ooooo, can we actually envision this happening? Check out our Venn diagram to see just how alike —or not—these fictional characters are.

Side note: Bradley Cooper is not fictional. Allegedly.

Holy whip! Bradley Cooper as Indiana Jones?