Thanks, voters, for caring enough to argue

According to historical accounts, Jefferson's minions accused Adams of being a hermaphrodite, with “neither the force and firmness of a man, nor the gentleness and sensibility of a woman.”

Adams' camp shrieked that Jefferson was “a mean-spirited, low-lived fellow, the son of a half-breed Indian squaw, sired by a Virginia mulatto father.”

Not bad for a president and his vice president, eh?

Adams was called a fool. Jefferson was branded a coward and libertine. Jefferson hired a political writer as a hatchet man. It went on and on.

So you think politics is rough today because a few taxpayers gathered to harass members of Congress over how their tax dollars have been wasted? Get real.

It's easier to keep quiet. That comfy pillow on the couch is also quiet. It's for sitting on. It doesn't complain when you plop down upon it while watching political news on TV.

For those who keep wringing their hands and whimpering about the loud sound of our politics, I've got just the solution:

North Korea.

The politics are quiet and peaceful over there. The last guy who stepped out of line politically got himself mortared to death. Not mortared with bricks — the other kind of mortar, the kind that goes “boom.”

Kim Chol, a military vice minister, made the mistake of having a few drinks during the official grieving period for the late dictator Kim Jong Il.

Kim's son, the new boss — they hand power down from father to child like we do here it in Illinois — was offended by the drinking.

He reportedly insisted there “be no trace of him (left) behind, down to his hair.”

And so the North Koreans zeroed their mortars in on flat ground. The guilty partyer stood where X marked the spot. Then they blew him to bits. And now he's as quiet and inoffensive as the pillow on the couch.

But here, in the U.S., we're loud and that's good. Listen to the echoes of it from this campaign. You know what that is?

It's the sound of liberty.

jskass@tribune.com

Twitter @John_Kass

CHICAGO

More