By Curt Wagner
12:01 AM CDT, May 16, 2012
It's the guidos of "Jersey Shore" versus killer sharks this summer on Syfy, with "Jersey Shore Shark Attack" kicking off the network's summer Saturday movies June 9.
Joey Fatone of 'N Sync and Vinny Guadagnino of the real "Jersey Shore" head up the cast who will play characters named The Complication, Nooki, Balzac, B.J. and J-Moni, among others. I was kind of hoping the sharks would lunch on the guido gang, but it sounds like the drunken pals will save the day. (Read the full movie description below.)
Syfy released its entire summer schedule Tuesday, and also in that movie line-up are B-movie icon Roger Corman's latest monster mash-up, "Piranhaconda," as well as "Arachnoquake" and "Bigfoot."
"Warehouse 13" and "Alphas" return July 23, along with a bunch of new and returning reality series. Take a look at the list below.
"Insane or Inspired?"
9 p.m. Friday, May 25 (new series)
This new series features the most exciting videos from the Internet that celebrate the world of imagination, invention, and extreme experiences. Actors Amber Benson (Buffy the Vampire Slayer), Samm Levine (Freaks & Geeks), Brooke Hogan, Ralph Garman, as well as television personality Josh Gates, host of Syfy's Destination Truth, join comedians Ben Gleib, Owen Benjamin, Jodi Miller, Elliot Chang, Jermaine Fowler, Adam Ray, Christiana Pazistky, KT Tatara and Janet Varney to provide their unique commentary on each of the clips. The result is a fast-paced hour-long countdown of hilarious viral videos.
8 p.m. Wednesday, June 6 (Season 2 premiere)
Haunted Collector features eminent paranormal collector John Zaffis, who searches for objects that have become home to paranormal spirits and/or energy. Each week Zaffis and his family help someone who's terrorized by something strange in their own home, using the latest technology to identify the source of the paranormal activity. On the season 2 premiere of Haunted Collector, the team heads to Warsaw, Kentucky, where a woman's home is suffering hauntings, possibly from two steamboats which crashed in a fiery collision, killing more than 60 people in 1868. Next, they travel to Huron, Ohio, in a race against the clock to remove the dangerous energy from an abandoned silo, scheduled to be destroyed in 48 hours.
9 p.m. Wednesday, June 20 (new series)
From executive producer Mark Burnett, School Spirits travels to schools and universities all across the country to recount the true ghost stories experienced on these academic campuses. The stories will be told in first person narratives through the testimonials of real students, teachers, parents and staff that have encountered the paranormal activity, blended with bone-chilling cinematic reenactments to further bring the haunting experiences to life.
SATURDAY ORIGINAL MOVIES
"Jersey Shore Shark Attack"
8 p.m. Saturday, June 9
Led by an all-star cast of Tony Sirico (The Sopranos), Paul Sorvino (Goodfellas), Jack Scalia (Dallas), Joey Fatone ('N Sync), William Atherton (Die Hard) and Vinny Guadagnino (Jersey Shore) the movie unfolds during the July Fourth weekend at the Jersey Shore, where angry sharks are on a rampage, devouring residents, leaving it to the local Guidos to save the day. The movie also stars Jeremy Luke as The Complication, Melissa Molinaro as Nooki, Joey Russo as Donnie, Daniel Booko as Balzac, Audi Resendez as B.J., and Alex Mauriello as J-Moni. The director is John Shepphird.
8 p.m. Saturday, June 16
Part fish! Part snake! All killer! In B-movie icon Roger Corman's latest, a hybrid creature – half piranha and half anaconda--attacks a movie crew on location near her nest when her egg is stolen. Now they must outrun and kill the deadly piranhaconda as well as stop the mad scientist who stole the egg - before they all become dinner. Stars Michael Madsen (Reservoir Dogs, Kill Bill: I & II) and Rachel Hunter (The Benchwarmers). Piranhaconda is directed by Jim Wynorski.
8 p.m. Saturday, June 23
Arachnoquake, starring Tracey Gold (Growing Pains), massive earthquakes unleash giant albino spiders. Freed from their ancient subterranean prison, the spiders go on a murderous rampage through New Orleans. Joining Gold will be Bug Hall (The Little Rascals), Ethan Phillips (Star Trek: Voyager) and Edward Furlong (Terminator 2: Judgment Day). Arachnoquake is directed by Griff Furst.
8 p.m. Saturday, June 30
Television legends Danny Bonaduce (The Partridge Family) and Barry Williams (The Brady Bunch) star as life-long rivals battling over Bigfoot. Howard Hesseman (Head of the Class), Sherilyn Fenn (Twin Peaks), Andre Royo (The Wire) and Rock and Roll Hall of Famer Alice Cooper (School's Out) co-star in the movie, which is directed by Oscar and Emmy nominee Bruce Davison (X-Men).
7 p.m. Tuesday, July 10 (Season 5 premiere)
Season 5 opens with two special back-to-back episodes, as Josh Gates and his team lead viewers on a chase into one of the world's biggest caves in the jungles of Vietnam to search for Bigfoot. Then, at the overwhelming request of fans, they'll travel to Romania for a return visit to the haunted Hoia Bachu Forest, the site of their most terrifying investigation to date, and then explore the reportedly haunted Mayan ruins of Tikal in pursuit of a monster known as the Belize Goblin. They'll also lead viewers into a remote Transylvanian village on a hunt for vampires and journey to Kazakhstan (a Destination Truth first) to search for the legendary Kazakh monster.
9 p.m. Tuesday, July 10 (new series)
Paranormal Highway puts the pedal to the metal as Jack Osbourne and his friend Dana Workman do their own first-person investigations of the most frightening claims of paranormal activity along America's remote back roads. Fueled by eyewitness interviews and evidence collected by Jack's state-of-the-art equipment, he and Dana will travel alone, self-documenting their harrowing face-to-face encounters with the paranormal.
8 p.m. Monday, July 16 (series finale)
After five seasons, Syfy's long-running original series comes to an end and the remarkable residents of Eureka say their goodbyes. During the thrilling final season, the town is reeling after the Astraeus and her crew mysteriously vanished just before their planned launch to Titan. As the town copes with the shocking personal changes caused by the Astraeus ordeal, they continue to uncover the truth about the forces behind the crew's bizarre disappearance--with shocking results.
8 p.m. Monday, July 23 (Season 4 premiere)
Season 4 kicks off with the Warehouse Team still reeling from the shocking events of the climactic season three finale--the loss of Agent Steve Jinks (Aaron Ashmore), Mrs. Frederic (CCH Pounder), H.G. Wells (Jaime Murray) and the destruction of the Warehouse itself. Their only hope lies in racing to the other side of the Earth to hunt down an obscure artifact, which may or may not even exist--and if it does exist, what consequences will they face for using it? The most successful series in Syfy history, Warehouse 13 follows a team of government agents who work at a massive, top-secret storage facility in windswept South Dakota which houses every strange artifact, mysterious relic, fantastical object and preternatural souvenir ever collected by the U.S. government. The Warehouse's caretaker Artie Nielsen (Saul Rubinek) charges Pete Lattimer (Eddie McClintock), Myka Bering (Joanne Kelly) and Claudia Donovan (Allison Scagliotti) with chasing down reports of supernatural and paranormal activity in search of new objects to cache at the Warehouse, as well as helping him to control the Warehouse itself. Sam Huntington (Being Human) will be among the star-studded array of season 4 guest stars.
9 p.m. Monday, July 23 (Season 2 premiere)
In Syfy's action-packed hit drama series, an unlikely team of ordinary people with superhuman physical and mental abilities--known as Alphas--takes on mysterious cases the CIA, FBI and Pentagon are unable to solve and go head-to-head with criminal Alphas. Season 2 picks up eight months after last year's finale with the stage set for an explosive turn of events at the Binghamton facility (the Guantanamo of the Alpha world) that could have devastating, far-reaching consequences. Dr. Lee Rosen (Emmy Award-winner and Academy Award-nominee David Strathairn), having exposed the existence of Alphas to the unsuspecting public, finds himself discredited and imprisoned by a government desperate to cover up his revelation. The rest of the core team has disbanded and some, without Rosen's guidance and care, have regressed to their old, destructive ways. They must now battle their individual demons in order to reunite and try to save their own. Alphas also stars Malik Yoba, Warren Christie, Azita Ghanizada, Ryan Cartwright and Laura Mennell. Erin Way (Detroit 187, Private Practice) joins the cast this season as "Kat" a mysterious young loner whose Alpha ability allows her to pick up any skill at a glance. But while her skills are permanent, her personal memories are short-lived.
9 p.m. Wednesday, Aug.8 (Season 2 premiere)
Using a mixture of intimate first-hand testimony, actual home video and gritty realistic drama, the hit series Paranormal Witness returns to transport viewers into a world turned upside-down by extraordinary, terrifying and sometimes life-threatening paranormal events. Paranormal Witness is produced by Raw TV (Locked Up Abroad and Gold Rush Alaska). Executive producers are Dimitri Doganis and Bart Layton.
8 p.m. Tuesday, Aug. 21 (Season 3 premiere)
Syfy's hit competition reality series returns for season 3 with 12 aspiring special effects make-up artists and their unlimited imaginations, competing to create amazing works of living art. The 11-episode season will feature some of the most difficult challenges ever attempted and high power special guest judges. It all culminates in one winner and one $100,000 grand prize that will launch a career. McKenzie Westmore returns as host.
Copyright © 2014 Chicago Tribune Company, LLC