suit at the bar

Getting free drinks from the suit at the end of the bar
The funny-sexy cop from “Bridesmaids” sends Marnie and Jessa martinis from the end of the bar to strike up conversation.
7--This is yet another girl thing that hasn’t happened to me. And I’m not really complaining. Men in suits make me uncomfortable, and if a dude was wearing a suit to any of the bars I go to, he would most definitely be a serial killer. -JG
5--The girls whose legs don't touch when they walk are the same ones who get suits buying them drinks. The guys who buy me drinks ask if I "fancy another whiskey." -DM

 

Hanging out wearing long underwear with your dude
Dubbed “giant baby suits,” Hannah and Adam talk wear matching long underwear while discussing the shower pee incident.
2--Um, isn’t it summer in New York City? Gross. -JG
1--No. This is a naked time. -DM

 

wannabe dj

Discovering a guy is a wannabe DJ
After some resistance from Jessa, Marnie convinces her to go back to Thomas John’s (guy from the bar) apartment for wine. He has an elaborate setup in his lavish apartment so he can create his mash-ups, which he, of course, plays for the girls.
7--Considering maybe one out of every five DJ hobbyists is somewhat tolerable, this is usually the kiss of death. Horrifying. -JG
7--This is marginally better than the aspiring improv comedian, if only because you can pretend later like you were dancing really, really hard. -DM

 

girl makeout

Impromptu makeout with your straight girlfriend in front of a guy
Look at that! Marnie and Jessa are now making out on the floor of Thomas John’s apartment.
7--Act of rebellion. I know Marnie is kind of losing her mind, but I’ve never understood how kissing another girl seems like a viable way to “be free” or rebel when times are though. I blame Katy Perry. And porn, I guess. -JG
6--Didn't they call this "giving it the old college try"? Take a message, ladies, the grown-up version of this escape route is the friend-has-a-phone-emergency. Although this is the guy from "Bridesmaids"... -DM

 

apology

Middle of the night wakeup to apologize
Adam wakes up Hannah and asks her to come outside. He has plastered “I’m sorry” signs on a wall near the intersection where he yelled at a car that almost hit him and Hannah earlier that day.
7--While the creativity and thoughtfulness is appreciated, you have to be pretty selective about when and under what circumstances you should wake up your significant other in the middle of the night to apologize. Uninterrupted sleep is precious, you guys. -JG
8--Ohhh, this is adorable. Although if a guy put me up on his shoulders like that, I'd probably freak the [bleep] out and start screaming that one broken back is enough for a lifetime. But in general, love it. --DM

 

Check back next week for another scorecard, and "like" Show Patrol on Facebook for more TV goodies. 

Dana Moran is RedEye’s Whoville gossip goddess. She DOES fancy another whiskey. @redeyedana

Jessica Galliart is RedEye’s social media lady. She totally lives alone. *winkwink* @jessicagalliart @jessicagalliart