'Girls' recap: 'I Get Ideas'

What's everyone up to in the morning? Hannah's brushing her teeth, Shosh and Ray are talking in bed about pig bathing, Marnie's on a crappy job interview and Jessa may not recognize that mornings exist. Things get infinitely more ridiculous from there.

Season 2, Episode 2

“Hannah’s unnerved by Adam’s creepy dirges that he posted on the Web, but is miffed by Sandy’s critique of her essay. Meanwhile, Marnie considers a new career path; Elijah confesses a recent transgression to George; and Jessa gets a gift from her husband.”

Memorable Quotes

“And I just let you talk because that’s the kind of thing 25-year-old boys say when their mothers are from Boulder Springs.” -George

“I know i always say he was murdery in a sexy way, but what if he’s murdery in a murder way?” -Hannah

“I can deal with your judgment, because I’ve always marched to the beat of my own drummer--ever since i cut my camp shirt into a halter top.” -Hannah

“I just don’t want to be around people who don’t hate everything about their life right now.” -Marnie

“We got fucking matching tiger tattoos!” -Thomas John

“When we have sex there’s no part of me that wants to pretend like I don’t exist.” -Hannah

“Thank you for enlightening me about how tough things are for minorities.” -Sandy

“‘Oh, I’m a white girl and I moved to New York and I’m having a great time and i have a fixed gear bike and i’m dating a black guy!’” -Sandy

“You just said a Missy Elliott lyric.” / “I don’t know who that is.” / “Bullshit!” -Sandy/Hannah

“You look like a slutty Von Trap child.” -Elijah

“I know I make only 40 dollars a day at Grumpy’s, but that’s, like, clean money.” -Hannah

“As a man living my man life, my desire for you cannot be repressed.” -Adam

Best scene: A-brush ya teeth

In one of those everyday morning moments, Hannah and Sandy are having cutesy couple toothbrush time in the bathroom when Elijah pops in, exaperatedly seeking his facial brush. Question about those Clairsonic things: Do they actually make a big difference. Elijah just can't help himself from heckling Sandy about his political beliefs: "Are your parents Republican?" he sneers. "You don't need two Republicans to make a Republican. They're like terrorists, you don't need two terrorists to make a terrorist," he throws back. But the best partmay be Hannah's Elijah's extreme hair-poofing. "You've gone too far," she giggles. And the day goes on.

Winner: Jessa

Lounging around her new Brooklyn high-rise apartment in her bra and a robe and painting portraits of her new yuppie husband, Jessa seems legitimately happy. That won’t last long, but it’s good to see someone in the group so seemingly confident in her choices (for now, at least).

Loser: Hannah

Let us count the ways: She has to deal with her roommate hating her new boyfriend, she pisses off her new boyfriend, like, five minutes into their relationship and gets herself kicked out of his apartment, she regresses to the point of being even more delusional than she was a year ago, she can’t be happy for best friend Marnie for five minutes, then she gets Adam courted off to jail. Hannah, in this episode, is what we would call a royal fuckup.

Runner up: Marnie

She just can’t catch a break, man.

We'll be back next week with another "Girls" recap. What's to come? Hannah tries cocaine for a revealing article assignment, and Elijah tags along for the bumpy ride. Marnie reunites with that aggressive, pint-sized artist Booth Jonathan. Chaos ensues.


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