Entertainment Entertainment Movies

'Texas Chainsaw 3D' review: Rusty

*1/2 (out of four)

Since it's missing one particular word in its title, “Texas Chainsaw” now sounds almost like a menacingly named barbecue joint with an unnecessarily aggressive style of cutting its meat, likean Iron Chef who took the name to extremes.

The likewise technique-free (and pointlessly 3D) “Texas Chainsaw” is just another attempt to replicate the twisted terror of Tobe Hooper’s influential 1974 classic “The Texas Chain Saw Massacre” without most of the style that still makes it freaky. After a shift at a grocery store that appears to exclusively employ hotties, Heather (Alexandra Daddario of “Parenthood”) learns she has a grandmother in Texas who passed away and left her a house. It’s clear that Heather is the baby who was kidnapped following the slaughter in 1973—the new film opens with footage from the original and then a new scene, in which local vigilantes shoot Leatherface’s family and burn down their house—ignoring the fact that would make Heather nearly 40 and well out of her midriff-baring mid-20s.

Not that continuity is a priority in this grisly effort from director John Luessenhop (who wrote and directed 2010’s instantly forgotten “Takers”). By now Leatherface (Dan Yeager), who still has both arms to indicate that “Texas Chainsaw” imagines the squishy 2003 remake never happened, surely wouldn’t be able to move so quickly in, what, his mid-70s? He’d at least have issues wielding the chainsaw as he attempts to pick off Heather and her vacationing friends, including Tania Raymonde as Standard Hot And Untrustworthy Co-Worker and R&B singer Tremaine “Trey Songz” Neverson as Heather’s Muscular Boyfriend Who Can’t Resist Hot And Untrustworthy Co-Worker.

Leatherface remains an unsettling villain; in isolated moments “Texas Chainsaw” recaptures the frenzied mania of Hooper’s effectively cheap-looking shocker. More often this unnecessary sequel proves loud and thoroughly predictable, and yet another modern horror flick more interested in the killer than the killed. Daddario should sound a lot madder by the time she asks, “How could you leave us alone in that house?,” though that’s less suspect than the filmmakers asking us to take sides with a deranged killer.

As Heather weighs family responsibility and dudes yell about finishing what they started/not on my watch/yadda yadda, it’s hard to be scared when thinking “Really?!” Though gazing upon the burly, 6’5” Leatherface, I was also thinking, “This is the kind of guy people wanted to play Jack Reacher?”

Watch Matt on “You & Me This Morning,” Friday at 6:55 a.m. on WCIU, the U



Want more? Discuss this article and others on RedEye's Facebook page.


Copyright © 2015, RedEye
Related Content
  • Man fatally shot after argument over woman at South Loop lounge
    Man fatally shot after argument over woman at South Loop lounge

    An argument over a woman led to one man being killed and another wounded during a shooting inside a South Loop music lounge early Saturday, police said.

  • Oklahoma fraternity's racist chant learned on a cruise
    Oklahoma fraternity's racist chant learned on a cruise

    Members of a University of Oklahoma fraternity apparently learned a racist chant that recently got their chapter disbanded during a national leadership cruise four years ago that was sponsored by the fraternity's national administration, the university's president said Friday.

  • In NYC building collapse, mayor cites 'inappropriately' tapped gas line; 2 missing
    In NYC building collapse, mayor cites 'inappropriately' tapped gas line; 2 missing

    Someone may have improperly tapped a gas line before an explosion that leveled three apartment buildings and injured nearly two dozen people, Mayor Bill de Blasio said Friday as firefighters soaked the still-smoldering buildings and police searched for at least two missing people.

  • Emanuel uses borrowing to cope with Daley's debt burden
    Emanuel uses borrowing to cope with Daley's debt burden

    Mayor Rahm Emanuel has reduced spending and increased fines, fees and certain taxes to shrink the chronic budget deficits left over from his predecessor, Richard M. Daley.

  • Six Flags Great America's lost attractions
    Six Flags Great America's lost attractions

    Not every ride's the Willard's Whizzer. That iconic coaster debuted in 1976 when Marriott's Great America, now Six Flags Great America, in Gurnee, Ill., first opened. And it's still popular today. But for every Whizzer there's a Tidal Wave, Shockwave or Z-Force, rides existing only in memory.

  • Denim's just getting started
    Denim's just getting started

    Five years ago, denim-on-denim defied all of the dire warnings in the "Undateable" handbook: Instead of evoking John Denver or Britney Spears in her misstyled youth, chambray shirts paired with darker blue jeans became as cool as actor Johnny Depp and street-style heroine Alexa Chung.