Entertainment Entertainment Dating

Why is sex at 30 so awesome?

I had heard from older friends that sex for women gets better in their late-20s and 30s, but I never really believed it until I hit 30. Holy crap, it's true! My sex drive is way more intense and I have more orgasms more easily than ever before. Not that I need justification to enjoy my awesome new sex life, but I'm just curious, why does this happen?

—30 and loving it

This is a phenomenon that can be traced back to Dr. Alfred Kinsey, whose 1953 book “Sexual Behavior in the Human Female” noted women tend to hit their sexual stride in their dirty 30s. But, remember that Kinsey’s research was conducted in the 1940s. By the time these lusty ladies hit their 30s, they were married and had a couple of kids. Pre-marital sex was very much frowned upon, and well, it was just a very oppressive time to own a vagina. Kind of like today actually! So it would make sense that Kinsey’s women in their teens and 20s wouldn’t have the knowledge and access to sexual pleasure that women have today.

That said, there’s no scientific evidence that a “sexual peak” exists in either men or women. Our bodies and hormones are fluctuating all the time, and our “sex drives” (a very subjective term) change just as frequently. Though several studies do point to a peak in women’s sex drives when they hit the middle of their reproductive cycle, which is why you might find yourself on that barstool or sexting an ex around that time.

The dirty 30s myth is counterintuitive on a few biological levels, namely that after adolescence, testosterone, which is the main hormone involved in libido, decreases steadily in both men and women as we age. Also, women are most-fertile in their early 20s, so it makes little sense that it’d take another decade for our bodies to be like, “Oh, hey, sex! Me likey.” This isn’t to say I’m not happy for your newfound life as an orgasm-machine. I totally am. But research on the topic has revealed that there’s no age when we are our most randy.

However, there are lots of other reasons that might account for your sudden increase in sexytimes, including the delightfully out-of-our-hands occurrence known as aging. A pleasant by-product of getting older is you give less of a f**k about what others think, your inhibitions are lowered, and you (most likely) have your shit more together. You’re probably getting more sleep and feeling generally more stable in your life. Plus, by your 30s, you’ve been around the block several times. You know your body and what feels good. You’re better able to communicate your desires to your partners than you were in your fumbling teens and regrettable 20s. All of these things lead to better, happier times in the sack. Basically, your sexual “peak” will be any time you feel comfortable and desirable in your skin.

Want to ask Anna an anonymous question about love, sex or dating? Email your quandary to redeyedating@gmail.com. 

Need to give your dating life a boost? Sign up for RedEye Dating. Pick dates, not people.

Copyright © 2015, RedEye
Related Content
  • Is dating your roommate a bad idea?
    Is dating your roommate a bad idea?

    I just started seeing this really fantastic girl. She's fun, smart, ambitious. It's too soon for us to be really serious, but I do like her a lot. Just one problem: She's my roommate. We're both 21, live in a house with three other people, and there's a strict 'no couples' rule when we seek...

  • Advice for men who suck at picking women up at bars
    Advice for men who suck at picking women up at bars

    I'm terrible at talking to women in bars. I always feel so awkward, and never know what to say. On the rare occasion that I've gotten a few numbers from girls, it never leads anywhere. What can I do to get over myself?

  • The key to talking dirty during sex
    The key to talking dirty during sex

    My boyfriend and I are having sex. It's great sex. But lately he has wanted me to beg before he enters me. I don't know what to say. I try and try to come up with something he'd like. I beg by saying "master" but he doesn't want me to use master. He said it's a turn off. What should I say?

  • 3 boys, 2 men wounded in separate city shootings
    3 boys, 2 men wounded in separate city shootings

    Three boys and two men were wounded Thursday in separate shootings on the city's Far South, South and Northwest sides, police said.

  • Harrison Ford 'banged up' but recovering from plane crash
    Harrison Ford 'banged up' but recovering from plane crash

    Harrison Ford crash-landed his World War II-era airplane on Thursday after losing engine power, suffering serious but not life-threatening injuries as he used his years of piloting prowess to bring down the plane on a golf course and avoid nearby homes in what one expert called a beautifully...

  • Judge finds probable cause that ex-boyfriend raped escort
    Judge finds probable cause that ex-boyfriend raped escort

    A Chicago woman identified by prosecutors as an escort testified Thursday that she was raped by a former boyfriend after he used a fake identity to evade her online screening process and then showed up at her home in a disguise that included a beard, dark makeup, sunglasses and a turban.

  • Unions sue to halt Rauner's move to withhold 'fair share' fees
    Unions sue to halt Rauner's move to withhold 'fair share' fees

    State employee unions on Thursday sued to block Gov. Bruce Rauner’s attempt to withhold fees unions receive from nonmembers, calling his executive order a “patently illegal” attempt to weaken organized labor ahead of new contract negotiations.

  • Garcia promises to remove red light cameras on first day in office
    Garcia promises to remove red light cameras on first day in office

    Mayoral challenger Jesus “Chuy” Garcia promised to remove the city's controversial red light cameras on his first day in office, casting the automated ticketing program as a “rip-off” effort from Mayor Rahm Emanuel.

Comments
Loading