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Advice: 'My ex is stealing my friends!'
My ex is stealing my friends! Two months ago I broke up with my boyfriend; let's call him "Sam." We had a lovely, loving relationship, but I ultimately didn't see it going anywhere. So after much deliberation and heartache, I broke it off. We met through a longtime mutual friend; let's call him "Frank." Frank is my ex's best friend and my best guy friend. Now Frank is guilt-tripping me about the breakup, telling me I'm no longer on his "nice list" and generally acting like I'm a bad guy. This is in jest, but also not. It feels a little "bros before hos." I also found out that I'm not invited to another mutual friend-of-my-ex's wedding, which I was previously told I would be invited to. My best guess is that it's because of the breakup. How do I maintain these mutual friendships post-breakup? How do I feel less crappy about it all? Is it fair that I'm feeling a little mad at my ex for stealing these friends?
Anna Pulley, @annapulley
October 3, 2012