You know, in all my years of advice-giving, I’ve heard some pretty strange things, but this is the first instance I’ve encountered where a man was jealous of his own fist. Fisting, for those who don’t know, is the sexual act of inserting a fist into the vagina or anus. It has also been called “handballing,” “brachioproctic insertion,” and in certain kinky business circles, “Trumping Donald.”
Is it common? Probably not as common as porn would have us believe (but then, what is?). However, it’s common enough to have a handful (no pun intended) of books devoted to the topic, such as “A Hand in the Bush: the Fine Art of Vaginal Fisting,” “Fisting: Care, Responsibility and Trust,” and the even less subtle, “Fist Me! The Complete Guide to Fisting.”
As to why your lover gets mad at you after giving you “intense orgasms with his fist,” I’d venture a guess that he’s either insecure about his girth or has some strange notion that pleasure-giving when his penis isn’t directly involved doesn’t “count.” (Out of curiosity, does he also think oral doesn’t count as sex?) At the very least, remind him that his fist, much like his penis, is attached to him, and therefore he gets the credit for helping you achieve all those great orgasms. If he keeps that crap up though, find a new lover that will give you a hand without all the sex shaming.
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