August 7, 2012
Wedding season is still going strong. Do you know your social media wedding etiquette? Whether it's how you handle the invitation or the way you behave at the ceremony, many guests may be putting their social media needs ahead of the bride and groom's.
"There are a lot of people who are addicted to their social media and ... this is causing a lot of headaches for some brides," said Kristin Koch, senior editor for weddingchannel.com.
While tweeting your invitation or posting the event on Facebook might seem like a natural thing to do to share your enthusiasm, it's not a good idea, Koch said.
"When you post it in a social way and make it public, you are letting the cat out of the bag, and it's going to become very clear to some (that) they weren't invited," she said. "This can cause hurt feelings."
Koch said more and more brides are inviting people to weddings through their own wedding websites because "an electronic RSVP makes life easier for couples."
"They're more eco-friendly and less expensive," she added. "Plus, it provides a place to for comments that is private, so you don't have to deal with miffed friends and co-workers on social media."
Here are some other wedding tips for social media users, and for the bride and groom:
For guests: Don't become the wedding photographer.
"We did an informal poll and found that 40 percent of brides weren't happy about what people were posting of the wedding — either with pictures or maybe a video that was unflattering," Koch said. "Think about how much time somebody has put into planning their wedding. They want to be sure that the images that are shared are ones where they look their best. We advise sending the pictures to the couple directly and they can do what they want with them. Don't post any pictures of the bride without permission."
For guests: Resist the urge to give a play-by-play of the ceremony.
"Unless you are asked to do this by the bride or groom, don't be tweeting during the ceremony," she said. "This is a special moment and they want you to pay attention in the moment or listen to the vows, rather than have you checking your phone."
For the bride and groom: Manage your expectations.
"There is no way to keep a wedding ceremony completely off Facebook unless you send a note to your guests not to post anything," she said. "Just be ready to field questions about the guest list and be honest from the beginning. Say you're going to have a smaller wedding or maybe it's a destination wedding and that you want to keep it smaller. I think people would appreciate and understand that if you're up front about it early on."
For the bride and groom: Consider a photo booth.
"There are companies that offer photo booths or video booths with a social media component, so you can take photos in the booth and instantly post them or tweet them," she said. "This is a controlled setting for social media, and some brides and grooms prefer this."
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