If the phone doesn't ring, Sammy, it's the Cubs

Sammy Sosa said during a video website interview that he thinks the Cubs should retire his number.

This comes after another year in which the Cubs retired Sosa from their annual fan convention.

But still, the Sosa question persists like an infection from a dirty syringe.

At the Cubs Convention last weekend, Tom Ricketts was asked whether Sosa would ever be “welcomed back into the Cubs family.’’

I could be wrong, but I felt that Ricketts had a look on his face like he smelled something foul. Maybe there was vomit on the floor, not an unfamiliar situation for a Wrigley Field bleacher regular. Maybe someone nearby broke wind. Maybe worse.

Whatever, I don’t recall the Cubs having a void at bad teammate, nor do I believe they want to raise their cheating quotient. And this owner isn’t ready to embrace the monster that Tribune Co. ownership enabled.

“With Sammy, it’s awkward,’’ Ricketts said. “I think over time there’ll be a good solution for all this stuff, but obviously I think you saw what happened to the Hall of Fame voting this year. I don’t know. It would be nice to put this chapter to rest and just welcome back all the guys who were from that era that people suspected of doing whatever.’’

Sosa walked out on his team during a game at the end of the 2004 season, an episode that capped a phenomenal choke by Dusty Baker’s bunch and exposed Sosa’s fraudulent image for the last time here.

Sosa was busted for cheating by corking his bat the year before. Do you really think that was the first time he did that?

Sosa also had been a poster child for corking his arms and chest with performance-enhancing drugs along with Mark McGwire, Barry Bonds and all the other inflatable superheroes of the era. I mean, did you see how mammoth Sosa’s head became well past an age when heads grow, period?

So, Ricketts had all kinds of reasons to scrunch up his nose, and then Sosa seemed to make it worse with his Ustream.com interview.

Sosa believes his number should be retired now. Actually, he believes it should’ve been retired a while ago. He also previously told Comcast SportsNet that he expects to be voted into the Hall of Fame.

The Cubs generally retire numbers of players who are voted into the Hall of Fame. Only 12.5 percent of the voters believed Sosa deserved that, and I believe they’ll lose interest in big numbers in succeeding years. After getting such a small percentage of the vote in his first year of eligibility, Sosa had better wise up and realize his support could fall so quickly next year that he might drop off the ballot altogether.

Oh, and Sosa told Ustream that he would be ready if he is asked to run for president of the Dominican Republic.

Bad enough that Sosa has been linked to PEDs, but now it sounds as if he’s dropping acid.

Whatever, if the Cubs want to reconnect with him, Sosa said, “They have to call me. I’m always available.’’

Operators are standing by.

Sosa’s cluelessness is a joke. This is just silly. But it does allow us to play this game: Compare and contrast Sosa’s imaginary Cubs image with Manti Te’o’s imaginary dead girlfriend.

Copyright © 2015, RedEye
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