We start right off with the encore -- Sabrina and Louis' quickstep.
To all of you who thought the "caught unaware backstage" opening was real last night -- they do it again, so, no. They go for the dramatic drop at the end again and Louis looks like he's going to drop her, again.
Bruno yelled at Joey during his routine, "Keep your frame!" Drew's little girl clapped and laughed after her routine and is just adorable. They show Helio and Apolo reacting to Emmitt's comments about the "race car driver and the speed skater."
Sabrina & Louis: safe.
Emmitt & Cheryl: safe.
Drew & Anna: safe.
Joey & Kym: in jeopardy.
Ooh, next week is going to be a double elimination. Backstage, Bristol is wearing some glasses that are not flattering on her -- they look like they belong to that woman at your doctor's office that's still wearing the Kate Gosselin spiky hair.
And now "British teen sensation" Cher Lloyd "sings." Google tells me she was a fourth place finisher on the UK "X Factor" and was signed by Simon Cowell to a record deal. She's not my cuppa.
Then we get a montage that amounts to, "The pros are choreographing harder routines for the stars in order to be competitive during this All-Star season." There, that didn't take so long, did it?
Here's our first Macy's Stars of Dance performing a "futuristic Battle Royale" (AKA we didn't get the rights to say "Hunger Games.")
I always hope I'll spot someone from "So You Think You Can Dance" in these routines, but I'm terrible at recognizing dancers in motion. If you spot someone, do leave it in the comments.
The DWTS Troupe now does a medley of songs/routines from past seasons -- let's see what we can pick out -- "Livin' La Vida Loca" (Kendra/Louis), "Sweet Dreams" (Derek/Ricki Lake), "Hey Puchaco" (Helio & Julianne). Except I'm pretty sure the originals didn't have this many lifts. Carrie Ann's head would've exploded.
Oh, and did you spot Benjy and Lacey Schwimmer? And Anya from SYTYCD? And the whole thing was choreographed by SYTYCD choreographer Jason Gilkinson!
Bruno cracks me up by pointing at the dance floor during Bristol's routine and simply saying, "Mess." It's like when I get really, really angry and I just stamp my foot and yell, "HATE." Sometimes one word is all you can manage and all you need.
Maks and Tony react to Carrie Ann's "Slam back" comment backstage -- apparently that was a big deal for Carrie Ann to say. In her backstage interview, Bristol does a lot of things that anger me: defeatist attitude ("I guess I'm always going to get 6s,") immature dismissal, ("Whatever,") non-blame accepting platitude, ("It is what it is,") and phoniness, ("It's all good).
If only she'd thrown in a "Haters gotta hate," I could have had BINGO on my card at home.
Aw, Gilles is consoling to Kelly after the show in the parking lot. That's sweet.
Shawn & Derek: safe
Kirstie & Maks: safe
Kelly & Val: in jeopardy
Bristol & Mark: safe.
Oh heck, if Bristol isn't in the bottom after being 3 points behind the next lowest score last night, this means her voting base is HUGE. The judges better take notice and not give her any more "pity" scores from here on out.
So, Katherine Jenkins and Placido Domingo sing operatically at us. I'm an uneducated rube when it comes to this kind of music, so let's assume it's really, really good. I can tell you that Katherine looks beautiful in a simple column of shimmery gold sequins.
Anna and Val come out to dance during the last part of the song. Tom chats with Katherine and lets her plug the fact that she's running her first half-marathon in London on Sunday. He jokes she'll be doing it in that dress. That might raise more for charity -- she should consider it.
Backstage, Chelise translates Carrie Ann to Helio and it's predictably adorable. It's so nice to see Tony so pumped -- I like him and it makes me happy to see him happy.
Gilles speaks to Bruno through the backstage camera and says, "Thank you, Bruno, and I love your keel-vage [sic], too."
It's fun to see Peta try to explain the word to him. I'm ready for a Helio/Gilles accent-off. Ooh, Karina was excited enough about their routine that she had to be bleeped.
Gilles & Peta: safe
Melissa & Tony: safe
Apolo & Karina: safe
Helio & Chelsie: in jeopardy
It's revealed that Kelly and Val are safe. Which leaves Joey & Kym and Helio and Chelsie as the bottom two. It's a little surprising to see former champion Helio in the bottom two on only Week 2.
And the second contestant eliminated is Joey! He's not too upset because he's going to a wedding this weekend. So there ya go.
My mom called me as soon as the show ended and spoiled it for me (I wasn't caught up watching -- I lag behind because I'm writing this) by saying, "Oooh, if they had sent Helio home, I was going to throw my remote at the tv and never watch this show again ever!"
So, you know, if you want my mom to be happy, you'll be Team Helio.Copyright © 2015, RedEye